It's a Transitional thing......

So, Bree has been sleeping in a cradle right next to our bed ever since she was born. I love it!! Let me repeat that, I LOVE IT!! I love that she is an arms length away from me. I love that I can hear her little sighs, grunts, and often laughs while she is sleeping. I love that if she looses her pacifier.... all I have to do is roll over & reach in her cradle to give it back to her. I love that on mornings I'm soooooo tired, all I have to do is scoop her up, pull her in bed with me, and nurse her. And every once in a while when she sleeps a long stretch of time & I still get that waking from a dead sleep panic type thing...... All I have to do is turn my head to look at her & all is well. I love it!

AND...Her cradle ROCKS!! I am really happy that I got it. But my only complaint is that it isn't a little bigger. Here is the problem, she is quickly out growing her cradle! I know I know...... my baby is nearly 3 1/2 months old........ and cradles are suppose to be for itty bitty babies. Yeah, yeah, yeah..... I know.

You might also be saying....... but she has her own room with a beautiful crib, comfy bedding, and a baby monitor. So, what's the problem then? Yes, I know this........ but here is the thing....... I'm not ready! I'm trying, but ..... but ..... I dunno.... I'm just not ready. When I think of my little baby sleeping in her big girl crib in her own big girl room.......... I get some sort of bizarre tunnel vision type thing & all of a sudden her room feels 3 miles away from ours. It is absolutely ridiculous! I know, I am aware, ...... But let me just tell you the awareness that it is a little crazy..... doesn't make it go away!

So, here we are, a beautiful growing baby, with a lovely room waiting for her,...... and a mommy that just can't handle it yet. Hahaha! Poor, poor sweet baby Bree, if I'm having problems moving her to her own room........I can't even imagine what will happen when she is going off to college!! AHHHH! LOL!

Well, last night Nick had to work really late. He has big deadline coming up, and wasn't going to be home until after midnight. He also leaves for work around 6am ish, and I knew she would wake up with all of the commotion of Nick coming in & out. We also have 3 dogs................ who all sleep in bed with us. Crazy, crazy.... I know. And let me add...... crowded!! I've often wondered why, when we have a King sized bed, I'm sleeping on the edge of the bed, with a smidgen of a pillow, no covers, and nearly wedged between our bed & Bree's cradle! Haha! I digress..... one problem at a time.

Anyway, lately, Bree has been a little more restless at night for some reason. I was thinking that it was getting off schedule with our recent traveling, but I'm not sure. It's not every night, but lately she has started going back to 4am feedings again. Then, this past weekend, after I got up with the dogs 3 times, told my husband to quit snoring about 10 times, & turned off my husbands alarm clocks 4 times (yes... he sets every alarm in our house.... including our cell phones), all in one night, I started thinking....... maybe we are disturbing her? I mean, who wouldn't be disturbed with all of this noise?? Maybe she is getting a little more restless because my wonderful husband snores like a freight train (sorry baby, but you do), my dogs might need smaller bladders and/or doggie ambien, and every alarm in our house needs to find a new home before I break them! So, I made a mental note......... Bree has her own room. ;) She might sleep better in there..... even if mommy doesn't at first.

So, I figured with Nick working late last night...... God might be saying..... give her room a try? So, drum roll p-l-e-a-s-e....... Bree slept in her big girl crib last night!!!!

You might also be wondering..... well, how did you do with that mommy???? Well, I did okay...........................

Considering I slept on the floor right next to her crib all night! HAHAHA!!! Yeah, yeah, yeah..... I don't want to hear it.

Bree did great! She still got up for her 4 am feeding, but I think she slept pretty good. Here she is waking up this morning.

So, now what? I think it might take several weeks.... & I'm not saying we are completely finished with the cradle just yet...... but hopefully we are progressing. :) Well, maybe I should say..... mommy is progressing! ;)

Happy Birthday Grandma Sapp!

We hope you are having a wonderful birthday!! :)

He passed!!

Nick passed the next section of his CPA exam!!! YAY!! The CPA exam is an extremely difficult exam! There are 4 long sections or tests, and you have to pass all of them in a certain amount of time..... or you have to start all over & take them all again. With as many hours as Nick has to work at times, it's hard to find enough time to sleep.... let alone study. Nick has now passed 3 out of the 4 sections!



We are sooooo proud of you baby!!! You have studied & worked so hard! Now, you only have 1 more section to go!! WoooHooooo!



We love you & are so very very proud of you!! Yippeee!! ;-)

First laugh caught on tape! ;-)

Bree has been laughing since almost the first week she was born........ But only while she was sleeping. It's really cute, but I have been anxious to hear that little laugh while she was awake. She has been smiling so big for a while now, that you just think she is wanting or trying to laugh. Now finally, last Saturday...... she put a little voice behind the happiness! It has taken me a little while to figure out how to upload videos..... but here we go. Hahaha! I love it!!


Photo Sharing - Video Sharing - Photo Printing - Photo Books

THIS child.....

"For THIS child I prayed......"

1 Samuel 1:27

Truer words were never spoken nor written. She is my light & love. I can no longer remember my life without my little Aubrey. All the many years I prayed for a child, I now understand .... it was exactly THIS child I prayed for. I am so thankful for her, ......our answered prayer! Dark days are so much brighter with this little angel in our lives! :)

My Nanny........

As most of you know by now, we lost my grandmother, Ruby Earline Sutton, on Saturday morning September 13th at about 12:45am. I still feel bad that I wasn't with her when she passed, as I was with my grandfather. Bree & I had been up with her at the Nursing home most of the day & evening on Wed., Thurs., and Friday...... and by Friday at around 9pm..... we were pretty tired. Nick met us up there around 5pm that day, and was able to give Bree a little break & get her out for a little bit.

That evening, my mom, my brother, and I sat with my grandma. We cleaned her up, helped her with breathing treatments, and tried to make her comfortable. After my brother left, my mom & I just took turns holding my grandma's hand.

As I left that evening, I whispered in her ear how much she was loved. I told her of all the loved ones waiting for her in heaven, and asked her to save us all a spot next to her. I kissed her face & said one more time, "I love you Nanny," and I made my way out of the nursing home.

Nick & I grabbed something to eat on the way home, scarfed our food down, and rushed home. When we got home I gave Bree a long bath & just let her play as much as she wanted. She is always a wonderful baby, but over the last couple of days with my grandma......... she was more than an angel. It's almost like she knew. In fact, one of the hospice volunteer's commented on how good she was, and that she probably did know. She said Bree was still close to the other side because she was so new to the world. (I know.... it may sound weird to some of you..... but I liked it & found comfort in it.)

After I let Bree play to her hearts content, and eat until her tummy was full, I got her bundled up & I put her down for the night. I then jumped in the shower myself. Nick was still sleeping on the couch, because he had been really sick that week. So, Nick went & laid down, and I tried to lay my head down..... but I just couldn't rest. About that time, around 12:30ish am, I got a call from my mom. My mom had hired a nurse to stay with my grandma when she left at around 10:30pm. Then nurse had called my mom to tell her that my grandma was getting really bad.

When I got off the phone with my mom, I was trying to figure out what to do. I thought I might have a couple of hours before Bree got up to eat & that I could just leave her with Nick. I just didn't know what to do..... and I was pretty tired myself. The next thing I knew the phone was ringing again. My stomach dropped, and all I felt was dread. I answered the phone. It was my brother. He said Nanny was gone. I went & woke Nick up. I told him that she was gone, & I just laid in his arms & cried.

I was always extremely close to both of my Mom's parents. I treasure that! But my grandmother....... I can hardly remember any family time without her. She moved to Dallas in the late 80's, and I probably saw her almost every other day, until I went off to college. She wasn't my "extended family".... she was my Immediate family. She was funny, and artsy. She could paint beautifully. She loved to laugh.... and she had the most contagious laughter. She would get the giggles .... or would "just get tickled" as she would say. And you couldn't help but laugh along with her. She loved music & movies. She liked gardening & loved flowers. She had a green thumb to say the least. She absolutely loved the ocean & beach. In fact, I can hardly look a sea shell without thinking of her. She always had tons of shells at her house. She loved God. She was always reading little devotional books or bible studies. She would braid my hair, and pick me up from soccer practice. She loved shopping, and getting her hair & nails done. She liked humming songs as she walked around the house. She volunteered for almost 30 years. She was a beautiful, beautiful woman. She told funny stories about playing in tar (when they were paving streets around her home as a child) and ruining brand new dresses my great-grandma made her. Stories about keg beer & boyfriends. She........ she is so many things & she makes up so many many memories of mine. I can't believe she is gone. And I ache for her.

This is kind of stupid, but a line from a movie keeps coming back to me every time I sit & think..... I should have stayed with my grandmother that night. It's from Fried Green Tomatoes and it says..... "she was a lady..... and a lady always knows when to leave." My grandmother was.... is a lady...... and I guess just she needed to leave.

Grief is such a strange thing, and I guess it is different every time. Loosing my grandmother feels so much different than loosing my grandfather. Both equally as hard..... but just different. Some moments I feel fine..... Others I just get totally over whelmed & start crying. Grief has so many colors. I guess it's sort of like the ocean tide..... it comes in waves.

As I sit here typing this & cry ...... I think how very blessed I was to have her as my grandmother, to know her, to love her....... She was such a blessing in my life. She hung on long enough to meet her great-granddaughter, and I am so grateful for that as well. Even at the funeral service, the preacher mentioned that he thought that "Aubrey will always have the most wonderful guardian angel watching over her." And I know that is true.

I love you Nanny..... Forever & always.... there is no end. You are a part of me & will always live on inside of me...... and now in Bree. I love you............

PRAYERS PLEASE

As most of you know, my grandmother has been in hospice for a little while now. We just got a call from them telling us my grandmother probably doesn't have much longer now. Of course, don't know if that will be hours or days...... so please pray for both my grandmother & us. My mom & I will be up there with her within the hour. I would appreciate all the thoughts & prayers you could send my Nanny's way.

Wordless Wednesday

The past couple of days.....

First off, Nick is sick. He is still at work & everything, but he is feeling bad. I know he hates, absolutely hates being sick, and I feel so bad for him. He works so hard all the time, and working long hours when you are sick ..... is just the worst. I'm also scared that Bree & I might catch it. My immune system has always been terrible, and I always seem to catch everything. So, I have been doubling up on all my vitamins & vitamin C. Please pray we don't get it too..... well, that Bree doesn't get it!

This past weekend, one of my best friends Katy was in town for a bridal shower. She was able to come out & spend the day with us! I was so excited for her to finally meet my little love, Bree! I always love getting to spend time with Katy. The last time I saw her was when Nick & I took our little "babymoon" trip to Austin & San Antonio, and I was about 35 weeks pregnant. Here are some pictures of Bree & her Auntie Katy.....



Also, this morning, I got a great little gift on my door step! Ummmmm, Okay.... let me just start by saying.... I'm not much of a shopper. I mean, I love to look nice and all..... but I don't normally think I put things together that well. Meaning.... I don't think I will be gracing the covers of any fashion magazines anytime soon. I would love to..... but I just have to be "in the mood" to shop..... which doesn't seem to happen very often. However, when shopping for baby clothes..... this same mentality just does not apply!! I LOVE BABY CLOTHES! I think I might have a problem! FO' REALS! HAHA! Just kidding..... kind of ... ;-)
Anyway, Macy's had this huge sale.... I started shopping online.... and found all these wonderful deals! So, I ordered Bree a bunch of stuff for next summer. I just couldn't resist. The most expensive thing I got was an $ 11 Polo dress that was originally $35!! The rest of the 2 & 3 piece outfits were $5- $7... Plus free shipping. Anyway, we got the clothes this morning! :)

Next, we headed over to spend a little time with my Momma, who had dental surgery this morning. Ouch, ouch, ouch!!! Bree gave her Nana some smiles & laughs before totally passing out next to her. :) Feel better Mom/Nana..... WE LOVE YOU!! :-)

A baby outing....

On Thursday, we had a little play date & outing with our wonderful friends Grant & Jenni. It was fun to get out & about.... but I'll tell you what.... getting out with 2 babies & 2 tired Momma's takes more energy than you think. I think that by the time we got something to eat and walked the mall a bit (in between changing diapers & feedings), we were just spent.

Here are a couple pictures of our day! :-) Here is Bree ready to go out....

Back in February, Jenni & I bought the cutest little matching boy & girl outfits for our little babies that were on their way! Now, here they are in there matching outfits.........

Thirteen Thursday.....

I have a secret, and I'm finally willing to share it. I have a love for TV show theme songs. Yeah.... you read that right....... theme songs. And I'm not talking about "cool" ones like from Friends, or even "old school cool" like from Fresh Prince of Bel Air......... NO, NO, No...... i'm talking pure 80ish (Or older) totally ridiculous cheese! So, here we go..... here are 13 of the theme songs I love, sing along with, and mostly know all the words to. I know, I know... I'm a dork! :) Hahaha!!!

1. Facts of Life


2. Charles in Charge


3. Saved by the Bell


4. Three's Company


5. Growing Pains


6. Punky Brewster


7. Full House


8. Blossom


9. Who's the Boss


10. The Wonder Years


11. Roseanne

12. Family Ties


13. Golden Girls




Now, I'll bet you have smiled or sang along to at least 1 one of these songs! See..... theme songs are good!!! ;-) HAHA!!

Folgers ain't got nothin' on this kid..... ;-)

....'Cause Bree is definitely best part of waking up! She has turned into such a little morning baby. Lately, she wakes up smiling & excited to start the day. Even when she is hungry.... she still gives me the biggest sweetest smiles..... with the most beautiful blue eyes I have ever seen! Oh...... It's just the best!!!! :-)

Movie/Music Monday

This song is for my precious little girl..... who wakes up everyday with the most beautiful smile on her face. She lights up our world, and adds so much love to her Mommy & Daddy's life..... more than we ever knew was possible! We love you so much Aubrey......... you are the love of our lives!!!!